24 October, 2010

I love my man inside.

I am in such a foul, grumpy mood I should be locked in a tower.  I am so fecking foul the icing I was trying to make for a 'I'm sorry I'm a grumpy bitch cake' for him indoors split!  It actually refused to bind.  Because I was being a belligerent, awkward cow I refused to bin it and start again so I kept trying to fix it.  It's now in the bin.  The cakes worked though.  Lovely little chocolate orange buns for my man indoors.  He who has refused to argue with me today.  Which is annoying me??  It would appear I am spoiling for a fight and it's even pissing me off.  Lots of reasons why.  I'm cold.  I had night terrors last night and therefore am tired and freaked.  It's my dad's anniversary this week.  But surely these are not reason enough to be picking a fight with the fella who just wants to go for a walk with you in Howth.  Or telling your kids to bog off as you're busy (feeling sorry for yourself).  If the kids were behaving the way I am now I'd give them a kick up the arse and send them to bed.  As it is I just want to get back in to bed and whine about how mean everyone is when, in fact, no one is being mean.  They're actually being very clever and nice and staying away from me.  
I'm lonely now.  I want to be in Howth but I cut off my nose to spite my face.  I refused to go because I was peeved with everything and decided that what I was really peeved over was him indoors taking the piss out of people who watch shit TV.  The really annoying part is I agree with him.  I hate all that reality shit.  But can't admit it today because I'm feeling foul and grumpy ..  and should be locked in a tower.
So.  To my lovely man indoors who has stayed away and left me to stew in my own self pity all I can say is I'm sorry for being a grumpy bitch.  I love you.  You're not perfect but then neither am I but it's you I want beside me for ever and ever.  What did that sign say in London?  Oh yeah, I love you with all my heart for all my life.  

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